©

When I die, know that you never wanted to know me.

grasskat:

mew mew!! =^.^=

grasskat:

mew mew!! =^.^=

"

A Guide for New Kitten Owners

Advice for new catgirl/boy Owners:

1. When kitten claims they are right, you might as well have fun punishing them because they won’t change their mind about it.

2. Know their food schedules, if you miss it…have bandaids handy.

3. Place nap zones all over the house, the likely hood of oral appreciation will increase the more of them you place in sunlight zones.

4. Your lap is no longer yours, get used to it.

5. Prepare to cuddle with your kitten at night, as well as lose all your bed covers, half of your pillow and learn to enjoy the 1/4 of space sliver on the edge of the bed.

6. Toss your alarm out, ritual morning pounces and back to back meowing for breakfast will be your new one. Trust me, you can count it.

7. Always keep handkerchiefs on hand, through most of the day with your kitten you will find your body damp from all the licking they will do to claim you.

8. Sitting alone is no longer an option.

9. Your hobbies now include petting kitten, petting kitten more, no seriously…don’t stop petting kitten…

10. It is now your duty to pet kitten whenever they want and to stop when they want. Feel free to try and do what you want, but again…have bandaids near.

11. What is yours is now theirs.

12. Seriously…paws off, it’s theirs.

13. Kittens hair will need brushed at the top of every hour, followed by petting.

14. Prepare for your kitten to only listen 1/10th of the time. And that’s usually their name call for food.

15. If you get a kitten girl/boy and are prepared for gentle love making, understand you will still come out of it with bite and claw marks.

16. Have a good story prepared for your workmates on why you always have claw marks on your neck and arms.

17. Kittens don’t do tricks. But keep trying, it amuses them anyways.

18. Don’t get a second kitten for them to play with if you value your sanity.

19. Invest in nightlights. Your kitten will automatically turn into a hunter at night and your ankles are on the menu.

20. Pet your kitten, did we mention to pet your kitten?

21. Cause you should go, right now, and pet your kitten.

22. Why weren’t you petting them as you were reading this?

23. Pet your pet, it’s very simple.

24. I said pet me.

25. Pet me already!

26. PET ME!

27! PET ME! PET ME! MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW…..

2………………pppppppuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrr……………….

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1 week ago with 1,085 notes

grasskat:

♥♡♥♡♥

grasskat:

♥♡♥♡♥

littleprincesskitten:

kitten socks!!!!!!

littleprincesskitten:

kitten socks!!!!!!

"THINGS YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR HUMAN KITTEN

1. Run your fingers through their hair.
2. Pet from the top of their head, down the spine and then grab their ass. (They like that, promise!)
3. Present her with a collar that has bling on it when she is a good girl.
4. Offer sushi when she is feeling sad.
5. Collect all the pillows in the house and pile them all in a sunbeam on the floor for her to lay in and enjoy.
6. A bowl full of sweedish fish makes less grumpy catgirls.
7. Angry kittens have one default “reset” button…brush her hair, you just have to pin her down first to GET to it…
8. Call them princess, because they like to be reminded they are royalty.
9. Whenever you pass by them, stop and pet her before moving on.
10. Chocolate milk in the bowl, and if you want extra brownie points…add some godiva or chocolate mint liquor.
11. Let her drink or eat out of a pretty crystal bowl.
12. Massage often, outside and inside.
13. Get her a big bow in her favorite color to wear on her tail.
14. Attach bells on her collar.
15. Don’t play fetch, but DO fetch her.
16. Take ordinary things, like her bowl or toothbrush, and wrap it up with a bow and paper, just because kittens like to unwrap things.
17. Bring home a giant box, put in pillows, fill it with all her stuffies and her favorite mangas and leave her be in it. She will never forget how happy you made her. Kudos if you did it in a sunbeam.
18. Back scratches, always a win….
19. When you see her yawn, offer her your lap.
20. Get a roll of yarn. Then get a spray bottle and fill bottle with water and add a few drops of her favorite essential oil. Spray the yarn and then let air dry. Then give to kitten to play with…again, kudos if she is in a sunbeam. You can also stuff some of her favorite hard candies inside the yarn bundle.
21. A can of tuna offering will always increase your sex life.
22. Let her scratch ad bite you during sex, it’s her way of marking her territory. She likes you.
23. Give kitten a blanket cave to nest in.
24. Kiss her lots.
25. Take her to a busy place with a comfy place to sit, just so she can people watch.
26. Rile her up and wrestle with her and let her win sometimes.
27. Let her scratch and bite, believe it or not it’s how she is showing affection.
28. Paint her claws.
29. Try to have a full on conversation with her just mewing.
30. Cuddles…it all about those cuddles.

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1 week ago with 3,199 notes

i-hate-the-beach:

I had to leave the end in. Kitten is ready for Daddy to come home yayayay!!!